Nicola Sturgeon interview: on filling Alex Salmond's shoes

When Scottish Conservative leader, Ruth Davidson, warned her party conference that Nicola Sturgeon would take the SNP lurching to the ‘left’, it was not a description that unduly upset the then FM in waiting.

Sturgeon is making her own mark. She is most definitely her own woman and she will be a very different First Minister to the man who has mentored her for all her political career. I ask her if she has consciously thought how to approach it.

“I was very conscious of not becoming obsessed by being different to Alex and very much letting what makes me different to Alex show itself over time because I think it’s always a mistake to define yourself by who you are not, as opposed to allowing people to see who you are. 

“I suppose the things I was conscious of most though, which was nothing to do with Alex but from drawing on my experiences as Deputy First Minister, was not assuming for a second that the step up to First Minister wouldn’t be anything other than big and significant because it is.

"I think you can have all the experience as a deputy in the world but I don’t think anything ever completely prepares you for stepping into the top job. Suddenly you have got nobody else above you so you can’t just say I don’t want to make this decision let somebody else make it. That can feel quite scary, no matter how senior you have been before.

“I was also conscious, following on from my first point, of being myself, to avoid the danger of trying to be what the media expects me to be and I’ve learned, sometimes the hard way, over the years that the most important thing you can do is be yourself, follow your instincts and learn to trust your own instincts. Sometimes you will get it wrong but hopefully more often than not you will get it right.

“In some respects, I guess it’s the same in any walk of life where someone goes from being in a deputy role or a role where they had a boss into being the boss, that there are lots of things you do in the deputy position that prepare you and that you draw on in terms of experience but it’s different once you are there.

"It’s different in a way that’s actually quite difficult to put into words, but I suppose the manifestation of it is the first time you are faced with a decision that might be a bit difficult or uncomfortable and you think ‘there’s no one else that can do this’. And sure you can ask people their opinion and you can take advice but ultimately it’s your decision and the buck stops with you. I suppose that is the moment that you stop and realise ‘oh my goodness, this is down to just me’. But look, I’m in the top job and it’s exhilarating and it’s fantastic but anybody who says it isn’t also slightly terrifying is not being entirely truthful with you.”

There is part of my brain that thinks I’m still 18, but when you are First Minister you can’t give into that part of your brain very often

I ask her what that first moment was and she looks slightly and uncharacteristically uncomfortable.

“I can’t actually remember. I mean, there have been a few moments… actually, I do remember but I’m not going to get into it because that would be unfair… In fact, I remember it very well, actually, but I think it would elevate that decision above other decisions and it’s not that that decision was that bit more difficult or more important than others, it was just it was the first time that I had that feeling of ‘gosh, it’s down to just me’. There have been others since so I am just using it to illustrate the moment you realise the difference between being deputy and being leader. What it was about is not that important.”

It’s an interesting moment of enforced reticence from Sturgeon, of an unfamiliar formality between us. A reluctance perhaps on Sturgeon’s part to expose herself as being more fragile than she would like to project. She’s not normally so circumspect with me and despite my cajoling refuses to go further. I don’t pursue it because I suspect the decision itself was not all that important and I sense it’s just a stage in her journey to being the kind of First Minister she wants to be. She’s feeling her way and conscious that she doesn’t need to give a running commentary of how that feels.

This is, after all, a grown-up job. Anyway, it’s a fleeting moment of discomfort and we are soon exploring the question of whether she has ever run around Bute House in her pyjamas shouting ‘I’m First Minister’… The answer, by the way, is ‘no’.

“Putting aside the question of whether I have run around Bute House in my pyjamas, Mandy, which I have not, I think, like many people our age [she’s actually 44 and a good seven years younger than me but I’ll take that], there is part of my brain that thinks I’m still 18, but when you are First Minister you can’t give into that part of your brain very often.

"Yes, there’s a big sense of responsibility, that’s not new for me in the sense of having been in government and any job carries with it a big responsibility, but being First Minister of the country is a massive responsibility and not a day goes by when I’m not aware of that and frankly, there should never be a day when I’m not aware of that. But yes, doing this job, you do realise that undeniably you are a grown-up.”

See the first part of the interview here.